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Pete Lewis

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1 hour ago, PeterH said:

When they installed a burglar alarm system at work the notice on the doors said 'This Door is Alarmed' - some bright spark wrote 'So Are We' underneath it.


1 hour ago, PeteH said:

Bit like the "Be Alert". There is always some wag, who will Ask, "what the bloody hell is A lert?".


I love this type of humour, some people say it's graffiti others say it's supposed to be serious..... If anything put's a smile on your face great..... If it doesn't..... Tough, get a life  :)  Where can i buy one from?


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2 hours ago, Anglefire said:

Our Robin does that - sits on the kitchen window feeder at looks at you.........

Back in the 90`s, I did a self build, in the later stages, I would go to the coservatory door and see the "resident" stoat, stood on it`s back legs to look through the door window. He/she was scavenging under the Bird feeders.


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I kid catches his mom in bed with another guy so she locks him in the closet.

The father comes home and the mother locks the lover in the closet as well.

"It's dark in here" says the kid.

"Here take my smartphone but BE QUIET!" says the lover.

Somehow the mother first gets the lover then the kid out of the closet and the father is none the wiser.

The mother bribes the kid to keep stumm.

A few days later the father sees the kid with the smart phone and when he won't give up how he got it the father drags him to the church for confession.

The priest sits down in the other cabin and the kid says:

"It's dark in here"

"Not you again!"

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Ok so the last post was probably a little deep for some of you. :unsure:

..so the following is a serious warning . . .

"to be very careful when cutting logs for the fire, when your dog is nearby"


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The Beer garden. Reminds of a (very) Old One,

Bloke at Brewery Falls into one of the vats, and sadly drowns. Manager goes to see the widow, to break sad news. Widow has a little sob, and ask`s "did he suffer". Manager replies. "We don`t think so, he got out twice to go for a Pee".

OK getting my coat!.

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