Daft things that Non Blondes do too.

[Wagger]

It has been a bad week guys. Eye hospital failed to give my younger brother a lens replacement due to his mental impairment (can't keep still.) He has cataracts and only had vision in one eye since birth. Now another long blind wait for him and I am his next of kin because the others are worse off than me. I now have early signs of glaucoma and the other two brothers also have all of these problems. Therefore, I turned to my past memories of previously owned cars and wrote this to get out of depression.

Apologies if it is boring. I can dig out stuff on previously owned Triumphs, if that is preferred. Even Audi and Citroen.

One of my non Triumph cars was a BMW E28 525e. Six cylinder (small six) SOHC and 2.7 litres. It was a really 'Odd ball' for a BMW. Rev limit was 4,500, it did 60 mph at 1600rpm and was a measly 120bhp at 4,500 rpm. The torque was 177 lb ft at 3,300 rpm and only released in the uk with a four speed auto with 'Lock-up' in top gear. Compression ratio was 11:1 so it needed high octane.

It was developed to behave as a diesel without the noise and did 37 mpg on the motorway. It was a good towcar and I kept it for 8 years, after which time it had achieved 250,000 miles.

It blew a head gasket at 170k and I studied the cylinder head carefully. Very weak valve springs and only three out of five camshaft journals used. The cams were short and low lift. There was no carbon on the pistons or the head. Another feature was very long intake tracts. The management system was Digital Motronic. I could turn the camshaft by hand with the head assembled on the bench just by clamping the head to the bench and gripping the belt sprocket.

Tuners would fit a head and management system to these from a 325 or 525 2.5 litre BMW with big valves. It then became a 220 bhp monster. The B27 Alpina is a verion of this.

These were the days before variable valve timing, but I learned a good deal from this car and it stopped me wanting to fit high performance parts to small engines. It accellerated reasonably well without trying, but not much more if I did. Nicer to drive than the 525i auto, and way less thirsty. I had one of those too.

My 2.5 Vitesse fits this bill quite well and I won't be tuning it.

My son turned down a Triumph 2000 this week that had been fitted with a BMW 2.5L small six. I currently await pictures of it.

 

Edited April 8, 2022 by Wagger
Changed heading to suit thread drift.

[daverclasper]

Only just noticed this thread. Sorry to hear you and your family are struggling.

I enjoyed reading about the car, any more stories?

[Wagger]

On 06/04/2022 at 21:07, daverclasper said:

Only just noticed this thread. Sorry to hear you and your family are struggling.

I enjoyed reading about the car, any more stories?

How about this one.

I owned a Triumph 1500FWD from 1979 to 1987. I noticed in 1986 that the starter ran on occasionally and ignored it. The handbrake was always iffy so we always left it in gear. I had a call from the first wife telling me that it was in the neighbour's garden. It took me half an hour to get home by which time the starter was still hot and so was the battery.The sills were resting on the remains of the wall that it had knocked over.

My investigation revealed that a wired had chafed through on the loom to the starter solenoid. It had engaged and wound the car in first gear about ten yards until it stuck. Towed it back with the Mini.

I replaced the starter (unique to the model) and the battery lasted til selling the car. Obviously, I made a new loom and re-built the wall.

All of our neighbours found this amusing, luckily. It would not have been funny if it had happened in a car park or on the roadside.

Moral is, do not ignore starters running on.

[Colin Lindsay]

That reminds me of my first Spitfire; my house at that time was built on a flat area dug out of a hillside so the garden behind was taller than the house and the front drive sloped away down very steeply to the road, quite some distance away. 

I wanted to work on the rear brakes so jacked the car up and, following my usual procedure, put it in gear. That doesn't work on a rear wheel drive car when the rear wheels are off the ground... as soon as I put any pressure at all on the mechanism the car rolled off the axle stands and away off down the drive with me in pursuit. Thankfully the steering was slightly turned so it drove over the flowerbed and ended up in the front garden. I had a lot of fun getting it back off the grass and up the drive again, but I suppose thankfully there was no damage to the car. 

[Pete Lewis]

things like that happen when auto's are left in drive when parked , our neighbour opened the drivers  door and revved the engine

it was aMG1100/1300  being in reverse the door swiped the owner badly and the car careered over the road and through a wall and flower bed 

the door was torn off exiting the drive gate post

Pete

 

[Wagger]

Went to Loch Lomond in my Motorhome in 2017. Watched a guy unhitch his Mercedes 'E' class from his caravan. It slowly moved forward into a tree ten meters in front of it. He had left it in 'Drive' whilst raising the caravan off the towball with the handbrake on. My shouting did not make him sprint fast enough. At least the tree stopped it going into the lake. He may hay preferred that than it being an exhibit for the rest of his stay.

Hardly any passer by could ignore looking at a 'Boss eyed' E class,

Another holiday ruined (for him).

[Pete Lewis]

we need a daft stories posting now !!!

Pete

[Wagger]

My mechanic friend and neighbour returned my Citroen XM Auto when I was out after an MOT. Left it in the road in 'Park' as many do due to the mysterious foot Park brake location.

Well, the park gear did not engage and, when the suspension subsided, it rolled across our Cul de Sac T junction into a neighbour's hedge. That neighbour contacted him and he had to retrieve the keys that he'd dropped through an open window. He had to shove his five year old son through to collect them off a window sill near a sink full of water. Wet feet and trousers.

Shame we never filmed things in 2003.

[PeteH]

Citroen`s, are a breed unto themselves. I had a BX Estate, and as those in the know, know. One could raise the suspension to what was described as the "wheel change setting". Encountering a flooded section of road. I raised the height, and gently drove through. Stopped, and whilst the suspension was resetting. The young lady in the Ford Fiesta who had watched drove into the flood and promply stalled amd flooded her car!.. Her comment to me was along the lines of but you did it!?.

Pete

[Wagger]

2 hours ago, PeteH said:

Citroen`s, are a breed unto themselves. I had a BX Estate, and as those in the know, know. One could raise the suspension to what was described as the "wheel change setting". Encountering a flooded section of road. I raised the height, and gently drove through. Stopped, and whilst the suspension was resetting. The young lady in the Ford Fiesta who had watched drove into the flood and promply stalled amd flooded her car!.. Her comment to me was along the lines of but you did it!?.

Petet

Yup, the XM had those features too. High setting was for rutted tracks but not at any speed above 6mph. I once adjusted it whilst doing 30mph and almost became seasick.

[mark powell]

We had a Citroen Ami.  Handbrake operated little round pads on the front discs. Discs cooled down after run and shrank a bit.. Cue chasing car across pub car park. No damage done. Left in gear after that.

[Pete Lewis]

my XM had a regulator problem , lots of whooshing  going on when it unloaded 

stripped it down and then re piped it incorrectly  as you do  ,  this rammed the valve spindle into the reg body like a bullet 

up to the scrappy for a nice quiet replacement ,

the dodgy regulator would fire the p/steering belt off at a roundabout   that was interesting 

but apart from not having enough feet on a hill start  a amazing car ( more a space craft) 

dont remove the headlamp glass to clean the reflector as its a blast chromed finish that will just wipe off    Oops!

 

[Wagger]

2 hours ago, mark powell said:

We had a Citroen Ami.  Handbrake operated little round pads on the front discs. Discs cooled down after run and shrank a bit.. Cue chasing car across pub car park. No damage done. Left in gear after that.

Remember that too. Took me ages to wind the pistons back when changing the front pads. Fine thread on automatc adjustment.

[Wagger]

2 hours ago, Pete Lewis said:

my XM had a regulator problem , lots of whooshing  going on when it unloaded 

stripped it down and then re piped it incorrectly  as you do  ,  this rammed the valve spindle into the reg body like a bullet 

up to the scrappy for a nice quiet replacement ,

the dodgy regulator would fire the p/steering belt off at a roundabout   that was interesting 

but apart from not having enough feet on a hill start  a amazing car ( more a space craft) 

dont remove the headlamp glass to clean the reflector as its a blast chromed finish that will just wipe off    Oops!

 

Had to brake hard and swerve in a country lane to avoid an idiot. The power steering belt jumped off. Only 500m from the pub, but no power steering or brakes and that was hard work. Suspension was on the stops by then too. Ran belt around the pulley as far as it would go and flicked the starter. It climbed back on.

[Pete Lewis]

twas a long belt  on mine was a 2 ltr   and any slack would allow lots of belt wobble 

Pete

[Wagger]

1 hour ago, Pete Lewis said:

twas a long belt  on mine was a 2 ltr   and any slack would allow lots of belt wobble 

Pete

Mine was the 12 valve 2088cc Diesel. One serpentine and at least one other 'V' belt.

[PeteH]

Ahh? Yes Serpentine Belts?. Chevy V8 6.4 Turbo Diesel in "pusher" configuration.

Pete

[ahebron]

Back in the 1990s I owned a Lancia Delta HF Turbo (carb model) which was a very fast comfortable car. Probably the most expensive car I ever owned if we convert money know to back then. 
I had parked outside a mates house on slight hill.
Knock on the door from the bloke over the road asking if someone at the house owned a red Lancia as it was parked in his front fence.
Handbrake had failed and the car had slowly rolled down the hill into his garden.
No damage to the car but a broken fence  which I repaired promptly as the owner was police officer
 

 

[Piglet]

Not a car...but my first bike aged 16 was a Honda SS50 (with a C70 head and barrel so it shifted a bit for a, ahem, moped). Local scrappy had an entire disc brake front end and I assumed this would be a vast improvement over the drum set up it currently had. Swapped the forks etc over and went for a test ride on the road outside my house. It was summer so I had on shorts and a T shirt and no helmet as this was just a 30 second run up the road and back. Well, it was a 15 second run as the throttle jammed full on, the front brake didn't work at all and the rear wasn't slowing me down. I hit a brick wall head first, blood pouring down my face. Thankfully nothing serious but I learned many lessons that day. Test stuff before you use it and never ever ride without leathers and a lid!

Alex

[mark powell]

I recently saw a post elsewhere about an American RV owner who left the Fiat 500 towed car in first gear.   No favours done to Fiat!

https://www.thedrive.com/news/rv-driver-annihilates-fiat-500-by-flat-towing-it-in-first-gear-on-the-highway

[johny]

Ha, Im surprised the Fiats tyres didnt slide until they burst! Must have been some big ol RV not to notice the extra drag🤪 

[PeteH]

1 hour ago, johny said:

Ha, Im surprised the Fiats tyres didnt slide until they burst! Must have been some big ol RV not to notice the extra drag🤪 

9+tonne, V`s 900kg?. Not much of a contest. I wrecked the Engine and Gearbox of a Smart Car, virtually the same manner behind My R-V. In that case the Smart showed a "False" Neutral on the indicator, when it was actually still in a gear. S-H gearbox and engine, £900quid. £200 to the young Guy who helped me do the swap, and reprogramme the EMS, £50 quid back for the scrap!. Afterward, I changed it for a full manual Fiat Punto.

Pete.

[Pete Lewis]

and gearbox lubrication being towed in neutral   is very often a quick route to a big sieze up 

Pete

[PeteH]

4 hours ago, Pete Lewis said:

and gearbox lubrication being towed in neutral   is very often a quick route to a big sieze up 

Pete

Been doing it with a variety of cars since about 2000. With the exception of the Smart. I have yet to experience problems. In the USA over a 5 year period I did 20,000 miles. 90% of which was towing a Toyota Tacoma pickup truck. Which after we sold the R-V my grandson and then his sister continued to use. As did we, on our occasional Visits too. When my son traded it for a bigger truck it made near as much as I paid for it in 2009.

Peter

[Pete Lewis]

the lube problem is on a conventional gearbox which relies on splash when towed you have stationary gears with a non lubed mainshaft rotating inside them 

one of the reasons most recovery lift the front end on a spectacle  lift and not do a simple tow .

there are electric supplementary lube kits out there if needed for long distance towing

Pete